sugarbaby-cosmic feeling xxxx

i finally said it...

i finally admitted it...

i finally let it out and i feel good in doing so...
i actually fell asleep and i feel like something was lifted from me...

had a great evening with friends and danced all night!!!!
but on way home my head spinning,,,messages,,,that i cant ignore and i am anticipating...
the whole time friends were chatting in the car and i was in my own little world!!!! hahaha

until he asked me to tell him,,,to say them,,,
i couldnt,,,thinking how it will affect a lot of things...
he asked, 'did you want to say 3 little words?'

omg...
yes?no?

what a bloody dilemma....

these are very big words for me,,,
i cant say them unless i feel them,,,
these words are the only words that i will refuse to beg anyone to give me,,,
much more,i wont give it to just anyone ,,,

omg...
what should i say????
got home literally ran to the studio...
 i felt light headed thinking about it..

but i either admit to it now or i would never ever do...

so i did...

i maybe a fool but an honest fool,,,
the worst thing that happened was i was blatantly lying to myself...
i was so scared it has become terrible...

and it shouldnt be,because this is the most wonderful feeling i ever felt in a long time xxxx

and i did,i told him,i told him everything ...xxxxx
and it felt like waves coming out in a rush waiting to come out,i felt relieved...

and happy..i didnt worry if i would get the same response,what i thought was i wont be selfish..
i know this will make things a bit complicated but thats not what i wanted,,,
what i thought was going to happen,,,

but i do ,,, i have fallen madly inlove with the man with the gorgeous smile...

it felt good to say it,to admit it finally,,,

where to go from here,i wont know,i wont worry because i know i wont be able to control it xxx

but yes,it is cosmic,like a new beginning xxxxx
and i cant wait to tread it.... xxxxx